Balancing act

It has been a while.... I know......I am guilty...

But I will make up. 

It has been 4 months since I last wrote, but also 4 months of new and fresh inspiration.
New experiences in life, new experiences into my happiness journey.

What I have done?
Well, beginning of April, I left Shanghai with 1 suitcase. 
I went to Bali. Completed my Yoga Teacher Training and taught yoga for a month at the Bali silent retreat. 
Afterwards I went to see a friend in Singapore and there I decided to travel through India to experience the country and culture where the yoga was born. 
I will write about my travel experiences separately. 

After India I went back home to the Netherlands.
Currently I am still living out of the above mentioned suitcase. Who would have thought that.... wow..... speaking of detachment....... 

And there we are...... or better said.... there I am..... here I am..... living out of a suitcase, not having a proper job, not having a proper house, not having a proper life. But to be honest, I like it. I like the feeling of freedom, the feeling of lightness and I like the feeling of not knowing what will come my way tomorrow. But it is also scary..... scary because there's no direction or control. 

Lots of ideas and inspiration, but at the same time I'm confused and trying to figure out how to integrate my 'Eastern' experiences into the 'Western' society. Balancing with one leg in the spiritual and one leg in the ego driven world. 
Trying to find my way between soft and hard, old and new, feeling and thinking, wrong and right, the known and the unknown. 
 
Knowing that time will tell... knowing that all will be fine, no matter what. 

Namaste. 

 

Silence

Today is the 10th day of my Yoga Teacher Training. 
It's an intensive program, an intensive schedule.
The alarm goes off at 5.30 and at 6.00 we are in the yoga Shala on our mats in the middle of the rice paddies. 
Pranayama, meditation, asanas, anatomy, philosophy, ayurveda... these are just a couple of the subjects we are covering. 
After dinner the program continues: Bio-dance, mantras, movie night, making mandalas etc etc. 
Sundays we are 'off'. Shopping, laundry, studying.... there's not much time to relax or be connected with the rest of the world. I'm literally in my Yoga Bubble over here. 

The first couple of days are all about observing. 
Then the mind kicks in and you start resisting & questioning things....
Sitting in a crossed leg position over 8 hours a day? 
Chanting mantras 108 times? 
Getting rice sticked onto your face? Really.....? What for....? 
 
And that is exactly where the true Yoga comes in. Yoga is not just doing some poses. Yoga is about mastering the fluctuations of the mind (aka 'the monkey mind'). As the mind takes over control. It hijacks you.

Tonight we are starting 'mouna'. This means silence. As in 'Eat Pray Love' we will be walking around with a badge saying "I'm in silence". 60 hours in silence..... 

As wise men said: 

"True silence is not only without words, but without thoughts"

 

Namaste

Detachment

What a turbulent days it has been..... crazy
I basically spent my entire weekend sorting out my personal belongings.
It's amazing to see how many things a person can collect in 1000 days. 

1000 days is the amount of days I have been in China. 
To be exact it's 1013 days, but 1000 just looks better ;-)
1000 days......

And what an experience it has been. So many things I have learned, so many amazing people I have met. And so many things I have collected. That's what I figured out yesterday. 

Today the shipping company came to pack and collect all my stuff. 
4 guys. In 4 hours they packed my 'entire life'  in 56 packs/ boxes. 
It was like watching a movie fast forward.
And then they were gone and I was alone.....
Completely alone in an empty apartment. That was weird. And honestly I had to turn a switch not to get emotional. But it was also good. A good moment as a closure of an era. 

What I thought of today in terms of age eras:

between 
 0-10: you are growing up and learning
10-20: you start to explore and form an identity
20-30: you experience the life as expected by society (study, work, relationship etc)

and then......

this is exactly how it feels for me. At this point it feels I have completed a phase and I'm ready for the next. Ready for life...... ready to let go.....

And it feels good. I kind of feel enlightened not having my stuff around me.... detachment.... looking at the world with fresh eyes....

Namaste

Questions for life

The other day I was meeting a friend. We were discussing life. 
She is very much in control. In control of her life, in control of her love. 
She wants to know what is coming up and she plans everything she does. 
At some point, she said, "I have the feeling life is passing by on me". 

Then I asked her this question: "Imagine I give you a present right now. It is a box. And in this box there's only 1 life and you can decide what to do with it, what would you do with it? 

Here's 10 more questions as food for thought: 

 1. How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are? 
 2. Which is worse, failing or never trying? 
 3. If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do? 
 4. When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done? 
 5. If happiness was the national currency, what would make you rich? 
 6. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing? 
 7. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?
 8. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be? 
 9. What does creativity mean to you? 
10. What are you most grateful for? 

Enemies & teachers

Our enemies are our greatest teachers
They’re the ones who expose our lack of patience and compassion, and inspire us to work harder to become truly gentle warriors for peace
They give us the resistance to further grow & develop

I once read this in the 'The art of happiness' by the Dalai Lama (a gift from my lovely neighbor). 
I wrote it down in my quote book, but it did not really live yet.
Until today.

Let's say today was day of extremes. Of big contrasts. I saw the state of happiness of certain persons reflected in their actions and behavior. 

I was waiting for my lunch order when I noticed one of the waitresses going outside with a warm lunchbox. She handed it out to a homeless man sitting on the street (see pic below). 
It was a gift from an anonymous, warm hearted person. 

Then there was somebody today who acted in a very 'cold hearted' way. So bad that it completely upset me. I really have difficulties dealing with injustice and this was a hard lesson. I was disappointed at myself when I realized how it impacted my state of mind and mood. 

Then there was Jade today, who brought me back on track and made me realize again what it means to follow your heart. 

Even though I have taken the decision to follow my heart a couple of weeks ago, I have noticed how easy it is to fall back in old behavior and thoughts. Today my 'enemies' showed me what I don't want to be and what I don't want to become. This is exactly why I have chosen a different direction. The direction of happiness, of beauty, of peacefulness and of love. 

I'm not 'there' yet, I'm still learning. But what a great lessons, what a great awareness. 
Thanks to my enemies, thanks to my teachers. 

Namaste. 

Dolci far Niente

I love Italians. I love the way they enjoy life and the fact they are a proud of whatever they do.

"Dolci far niente" is an old Italian expression. It literally means 'sweet doing nothing' or the art of doing nothing. Blissful laziness. And I love it. And I love the fact Italians have an expression for this. They are proud of it! 

Personally, I'm very good in 'Dolci far niente'. And luckily now I'm at a point that I don't feel guilty about it anymore. Because these moments often generate mindspace and creative ideas or even solutions. So they are very precious to me. 

Many people however, simply don't have the peace & tranquility for this. And it is not as easy, especially if you have a family/ kids running around, asking your attention. It is actually hard work and you need to train yourself. Make time and stick to it. At first, for sure you'll feel restless and you'll have thoughts like 'what am I doing, I should be doing....' 

Think about the first days of a holiday where you need to decompress & disconnect from work and your normal life and to 'get out of your head'. Then, think about the last days of your holiday, when you are relaxed and things seem to be easy. You just enjoy the day as it comes along. 

So, why only having this relaxed feeling a couple of times a year during holiday? Try building it in your normal life. Built in rest points, recharge points, where you come out of your head, switch off your thoughts and just do whatever you feel like doing (as long as it is not an obligation). Could be cooking, daydreaming, exercising, reading, music, meditating, napping, whatever you like. 

Important is to disconnect. Especially from social media. Dolci far niente doesn't go together with Facebook, Twitter or email. So switch it off. Same for television, switch it off.

Instead of measuring yourself by what you have accomplished in a day, measure your day by things that made you happy or smile and think about what was the nicest part of the day. 

Enjoy!

Sharing is caring

I have received many positive reactions on the launch of my blog and I would like to say thank you for that: THANK YOU!

I really appreciate the honesty of you sharing your thoughts and feelings with me, because that is what inspires me. 

Reading through your reactions I thought about what I actually want to achieve with my blog. 
What is my intention? 
uuuhhhmm..... as it was not really planned..... no initial intention....

But thinking about it now, what I do know is that I don't want to promote myself, I don't want to use my blog as a Facebook sharing what I have eaten or what time I go to bed. No. Instead, I would like to include you all in my journey. A journey into personal development and a more sustainable lifestyle. 

I'm interested in 'what makes people happy' and what contributes to a more conscious and better life quality. So this is what I'll be 'researching'. I hope to read a lot, I hope to explore and experience new angles of life and I would like to share this with you. 

Not because I believe you should be doing what I'm doing, and I also don't believe I can change the world. But I do believe that sharing is caring, and I hope that this blog can serve as a platform for inspiration and 'food for thought'. Bringing a bit more awareness in the crazy world we are living in. 

In the reactions I have received I read people recognize or realize things in my experiences. 
That connects us and makes us human beings. And this is the essence. 
This is exactly what I am hoping for. 

Sharing is caring. 

Namaste.

Before They Pass Away

I would like to share with you following journey, a journey into life, a journey into the purity of humanity. 

Jimmy Nelson, a British photographer, visited 44 countries, to document the last 29 tribes. 

"The world must never forget the way things were"

3 Lessons Jimmy took out of his journey:

1. Judgements: look closer, you never know what is around the corner. 
2. Choice: you always have a choice, no matter what. 
3. Vulnerability: being truly who you are. 

Jimmy made a beautiful book out of his journey. 

Check out the project & the TEDx talk on following site: 

http://www.beforethey.com/#before-they-pass-away

Shanghai Cancer Alert

During lunch, I came across this article in a local newspaper, saying that every day sees 150 new cancer patients in Shanghai, while 100 residents die from the disease daily. This is scary. 

Rest my case.....

Happy travel tips

Being happy...... 
It is not a continuous state of mind. 
Life has its ups & downs. It is how you deal with it. 
A positive attitude results in emotional happiness. 
You get back what you sent out. 
So when you are grumpy, other people will be grumpy at you. 
When you are nice at people, people are nice back at you. 

Easily said, not so easily done. 

After having spent 2 weeks on Bali, walking around in the same shorts for an entire week, being in nature, enjoying a nice climate (30 degrees!!) it was harsh for me to come back to Shanghai. 
Compared to Bali, the temperature has dropped 30 degrees, it's grey and snowy over here (and freezing cold). 
Coming home in a cold apartment, I'm tired. I don't feel like unpacking my 2 suitcases (I don't know what happened to 'travel light' again)...... and for sure I don't feel like grocery shopping (my fridge is completely empty though). 
Instead of letting these thoughts taking over my mood, I decide to focus on the things that make me happy. So I turn the heather on (I'm very grateful for my floor heating :-)) put on some music, make myself a cup of tea and lit incense ....making unpacking into something enjoyable...... that works for me to prevent holiday blues. 

When travelling I always try to buy local things. Photos, soap, baskets, candles, whatever reminds me of the holiday, and as soon as I unpack my suitcases and find these things I get a smile on my face again. 
Especially things with a nice smell, like incense, or scented candles work very well, as I have strong associations with odours.

Here are some more tips for happy travelling (by airplane that is):

• Put a recognizable sign on your suitcase (label, sticker, scarf). I once lost my suitcase and when the airline asked, what does your suitcase look like.... uuuhhhh.... big and grey..... yeah, all of them look like that.... Having something recognizable on it, makes it easier to find your suitcase back (and it looks nice :-))
• Use a trolley. They make your life easier and they are for free, so better use them. 
• Bring a big scarf, super helpful when cold in the plane, you can use it as blanket, and for travelling you can use it as a cloth or pareo. 
• Hand luggage essentials:
1. Spray mist (e.g. Evian, or La Roche). As my skin gets so dry from flying, this really helps to moisturize (better than creme, trust me, I tried all of them....). When your skin needs water, it needs water, not creme. Make sure you bring the smaller one (<100 ml)
2. Nuts or seeds (pumpkin seeds, walnuts, almonds). Very nourishing, healthy snack. Especially as I often don't like the plane food, but mostly they serve yogurt & fruit, I just add the nuts/ seeds in it. 
3. Earplugs + eye mask: essentials for getting some sleep.
4. Hand wipes/ tissues 
5. Music (+ headphone)
6. Warm socks. My feet often swell up in the air so I take off my shoes. In order to prevent cold feet I bring warm socks (additional note, do wear slippers when using the airplane lavatory) 
7. Something to read/ Ipad
8. A good mascara. I swear by Sensai by Kanebo 38 degrees mascara. Doesn't come off, no matter what. 

NB. Of course you also need your passport, money etc.

• Book accomodation through Airbnb. I love it. You find the nicest places, get to know the locals, get insider tips for bars & restaurants. You don't feel so much a tourist and it's often cheaper than a hotel. Last but not least, you get to know amazing people. 
• Never put your house key in your suitcase when travelling back home. In case your suitcase gets lost, you cannot get into your home (yep, happened here....). Instead keep your house key in your hand luggage. 
• Bring something local back home to share with your colleagues. At my office it's an unwritten rule, that after each holiday everybody brings back something local to share. Often food. It's a nice gesture, you can share a bit of your holiday feeling with your colleagues and it's a good way to get rid of your last local money :-)
• Keep a (travel) journal. No need to write entire stories if you don't feel like. Just writing done some words per day is nice. Eg. what you have done, what you have seen, what you ate and who you met. 

Happy travelling. 

Did you know - Prana?

Prana is the Sanskrit word for "life force". Personally, I prefer to say "life energy". 

Oxygen could be described as our most essential food. One we often forget about. We care about the quality of our food and the quality of our physical exercise, but not so much about the quality of our breathing. 

Air is strongly charged with prana and therefor it is so important to take deep breaths. 

As babies, we fully breath into our bellies, but when we grow up we tend to breath very shallow, meaning the breath only reaches the chest, not the belly. 

The best way to breath is through the nose, a long and deep inhalation, expand your belly and slowly exhale through the nose, releasing the air from the belly. 

Fun fact of the day: did you know that one nostril (neusgat) predominates in breathing and that the roles reverse every 2 hours? Meaning, that every 2 hours the other nostril gets slightly blocked. Interesting :-)

Happy breathing. 

Namaste. 

Love is the answer

Everyday - every moment- no matter what is happening you get to decide will I respond to my life with Fear or Love? 

Choose Love. 

Obviously, it's not as easy as the picture shows. It is not just a button we can press. 
Especially in the Western countries we have been programmed to focus on the external environment. A society driven by consumption in which everything, consciously and unconsciously is being directed and targeted towards our uncertainty and insecurities - buy these shoes and be 'hipster', drive this car and feel succesfull etc. 

This is very flat, superficial and not sustainable. This is not what human beings were created for and this is not making us happy. 

Moreover, we constantly mislead ourselves with delusions, "if I would have that I would feel better" or "if only this person or circumstance in my life was different, I would feel happier". 
This focus on the external environment actually makes us very vulnerable. 

I like to work with daily intentions. This is how the ancient and wise Japanese would practice. 

Therefor, only for today, try:

- not to be angry
- not to worry
- to be gratefull

I would really like to ask you to practise this for one day and tonight when you are in bed think about which of the 3 was the hardest and feel free to let be know. 

Namaste. 

A present

"Make the most of today. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why it is called the present." 

Namaste. 

Enjoying the present moment

"You will never find time for anything. If you want time, you must make it".
Charles Buxton

We are all being so caught up with our lives, our obligations & expectations that we sometimes forget to make time for ourselves and to just 'be in the moment'. 

My life back home in The Netherlands was filled with obligations and expectations. Besides social obligations as birthday parties, baby showers, bachelorettes and so on, I was very good in setting obligations for myself:
'I need to exercise, I need to have dinner with....., I need to clean, I need to have drinks there..... I was busy planning, that I actually did not really have time to enjoy the things I did. 

I remember when I moved to Shanghai, after I was settled in and everything, I woke up a Saturday morning thinking, what am I gonna do this weekend? What do I actually like?

And those moments are the best. Just enjoying that you have weekend, go for a bike ride, go somewhere you have never been before, whatever or whereever it is, just 'be in the present moment' and enjoy it. If you are at home having a cup of tea, enjoy it. Taste it. How does it smell, what sounds do you hear. Just observe and be conscious. 

Happy weekend!

Ps. 
Weekend music tip for a relaxing moment (preferably with a good glass of wine):
Toots Thielemans
(The Belgian jazz musician, well know for the title song of 'Baantjer'). 
Completely chills me out. 

Namaste.